Creating a new habit does take decision after decision, but ending a habit or relationship is done in a moment (and then you just have to stick to it!). It is over starting the first time you don't go back to it. I think that's really the power of the new year. It's that an old one has closed, and you can't go back to it. You get to decide what to leave back there.
And with goodbye comes new energy, time, space.... everything a new beginning requires. Suddenly, the future looks bright, with all of its unknowns and wonder.
I'm being equally intentional about my firsts this year. This is my first use of my revamped laptop. John installed a new RAM and a solid-state hard drive so I can seriously start working on my consulting business. When he left for work this morning, I reached for my "new" laptop - opened chrome - typed in Facebook - and thank God it asked me for my sign-in credentials. That flicker was just enough time for an intentional thought to over-ride the frightening thoughtless habit of my fingers to open that blue page! I thought, "This is my first act here in this all new space - what do I want it to be?" I came here.
Similarly, I've had my eye on a dreamy Waterman fountain pen for most of the last 6 months. When John surprised me with it for my 30th birthday last week I took time to consider what my first act with it should be - I had pulled out a sheet of paper to write a to-do list and was of course going to use my new pen to outline it. Is that really what this fountain pen is for? Is that what my 30's are for? What I'm for? No. I wrote a three sentence love letter. Then, I wrote a to-do list. (I really do like to-do lists.) The acts are small, but with each first, I set a direction, a priority. I set it.
In short - let's say goodbye. And then let's take advantage of each opportunity we have to make a new 'first step' - allowing ourselves to intentionally chart our first moves, even if we can't plan out or control our whole coming year.