It's difficult to weed someone else's garden.
Years ago, when my mom was away for a bit, my sister decided to weed her garden. By the end it looked beautiful - clean, plenty of dark freshly turned soil.
Too much dark soil. She pulled more than some weeds.
This past weekend was filled with yard work - the good kind that leaves you achy and sore in a fulfilling way. As I pruned the lavender and hedges, and weeded through the front beds, there were several times I had to pause and think "What is that?" A master gardener might know, but I think even they have to think twice in the first days of spring. I'm no master gardener; I'm absolutely in the apprentice stage. I sat there staring at the little leaves just breaking through the soil, trying to make out the shape and recall what bulbs I've planted and where over the past couple years. Ah!! That's right! That's what that is! I thought to myself, thank goodness this is my garden, I think someone else would have pulled that. Shoot, in anyone else's garden I would have pulled that. It's difficult to weed another woman's garden. And yet, we do. The thought blazed through my mind, and began to take root.
How often do we look at another and determine what is weed and what should bloom on some sunny day? How often do you think we're actually wrong about it?
I spent the rest of the day cutting, digging and planting, feeling thankful for all those in my life that haven't tried to weed my garden for me - grateful for those who recognize that they didn't plant anything in that dirt - the ones who've been willing to show up and water for me, willing to wait years and watch, willing to keep an over-eager weeder at bay even. Thankful for those who know a thorny ugly thing is just a rose in the winter. She'll be beautiful by spring and blooming by summer.
We're all a bed of surprises, so let's agree to not weed each other's beds, okay? Chances are if you try, you'll pull out some daisies that really just needed a little sunshine and water from you. Or perhaps, just patience and a person for whom to bloom.
Maybe you think you're the exception because you're just good at reading people. Or, you're prophetic. Yeah, I've told myself that too. But I've had a few prophetic women tear me to shreds in a winter and I've still got some roses that just won't seem to bloom any more. If you're gifted in really seeing through things, look for the flowers.
Feed, don't weed. ;)