Friday, December 28, 2012
Sitting in a ski lift in a cloud.
2012 was full of so many wonderful things. I'm a bit terrified of 2013... like it could take it all away. Or just keep me exactly where I am.... for a WHOLE year. I have to move closer to my destiny - I have to see something realized, some desire sharp and clear again or I'll just ebb away.
I try. I sound just like a penny plopping in a pool. That's it.
Dreams waiting at the bottom.
I don't have time to master what I love - I spend my hours wasting at something I hate. And it is driving me mad. I know I am here for a reason. I keep reminding myself that. But I can't see where I go next, or how I get there. I can't see how I stop spending the majority of my hours in a seat where I feel dead.....
Dramatic? I know. I know this will pass. Just dear God, please let 2013 be at least full of glimpses. Remind me. What work will make me truly happy? What was I meant to spend myself on?