So I know Bianca doesn't read this, but I have to take a moment to share my gratefulness.

What comfort can be found in the faithfulness of a discipler. One who steps into the fire beside you, truly. Who intercedes for you, and when the flames burn hot and the tongues lick your heart, reminds you you are blessed, loved, gentle, forgiving, cared for infinately, and that this fire storm will purify your heart. Who tells you 'don't run' - He's accomplishing His will, even amidst the ugliness around.

What wisdom can come from a gentle word aptly spoken.

What freedom can follow from the prodding that doesn't stop until you shout out your true thoughts, the ones you hadn't admitted in your head yet. When the one across from you listens to the lies that plague you, and then looks you in the face and speaks the truth the lies had tried to prevent your hearing. Again, and if need be, again.

What growth can come when one walks beside you, year by year and remembers your journey with you.

These are many of the blessings of a discipler who seeks to follow Christ, and love and lead as He does. And one more, which is one of my greatest comforts- the slow but eventual conviction that your discipler is true and genuine, and she fights beside you. She is a safe place to go, and she carries the Lord's heart for you.

Knowing this through the experience of the last three years has shown me the blessing of Discipleship... it's made a sceptic a believer. Bianca has stood beside me through some of my most painful hours, and she's encouraged me to hold fast. She's seen qualities in me and called them out to a greater fullness... things I didn't quite recognize myself, but others now list first in my (good) qualities. She's waited out some of my misconceptions about her. She's actually, really listened to me. She's admitted faults, and revealed purpose, strength, and the Lord's greater will. She's taught me the value of humility, graciousness, and love.....and how they can coexist with strength that holds on through fire.

Aw, I hope this has conveyed some of my gratefulness for Bianca, and especially for the Lord's goodness to place her divinely in my life and tie our hearts together over the past 3 years. The Lord's been good to me. I sincerely don't know where I'd be without discipleship in my life. And of course when I say that, everything I say of my discipler is true because of it's reflection of my Discipler.

When I look into a year that has already greeted me with a few punches and tears, I become all the more grateful for those in my life who I know will help me make it through a victor... who will look in my face and call out a lie, look in the flames and step in beside me, and look in the future and declare the Goodness of the Lord to me. I'm grateful for every person in my life who continues to sacrifice their self in obedience to the Lord, and how it plays out in all their relationships.

I'm grateful for my brother-in-law who is 'more afraid to disobey, then to lay down his dreams'- and who I know therefore invites the Lord to work in and through him and his wife. I'm grateful for my sisters', for their tenaciousness for the truth, and to seek out the Lord.

The Lord is always found by Seekers. This comforts me. If I knock and seek...

As if my heart is not overwhelmed enough by the Lord at this moment, Green Eyes just came on in UCL... it's like a love song from my Maker.... it's my song. :)

Thank You, Lord for your unending goodness, Your faithfulness that outlasts everything else, and Your love that conquers all.

(How strange do you think the other customers think the Little One crying in the corner is...? ;)